Dear Todd’s Mother,
It is with great regret and sorrow that I must inform you of the death of your son. Ensign Todd was killed performing his duty in a landing party on the planet Argus X.
I won’t lie to you, his death was pretty weird, even for Starfleet. He was killed by a vampiric cloud.
Yeah, I know. Doesn’t sound like a thing but you would be surprised how many of these types of encounters we have. Salt vampires, cloud vampires, the spirit of Jack the Ripper… I could go on but you wouldn’t believe half of this stuff and frankly I expect it provides you with little comfort.
Fortunately, many other personnel from our sciences and command divisions were not killed by the dikironium cloud so there should be some comfort in that.
Captain James T Kirk
Commander USS Enterprise
The original is up for grabs if no one has snapped it up already.